Jokes | चुटकुले

Ticket Chacker-Amma Kiraya Pura do
Amma-Mai student hu

TC-Konse school me?
Amma-Wo q batau

TC-Muje apni DAADI ka admission karana hai

Banta-Mai gali se jab guzarta hu to KUTTE mujhse dar k
bhag jate he

Santa-Apne BOSS se to har koi darta he

Boy-Agr mai kahu muje tumse Mohabat he
meri yhi chahat he to kya kahogi

Girl-Yhi baat agr tum Balance Bhej k kehty to acha hota

SANTA-Mai aur Meri Wife 20 Saal se Khush the

BANTA-Fir Kya hua?

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BANTA: Batao Na Yaar!

SANTA: Fir Kya!
Ek din Hum mil gaye..

Santa-Maine Tumhara No. Kitni Baar Try Kiya
But Tumhara Mobile 'SWITCH OFF' Tha
Banta-Abe Wo Meri 'HELLO TUNES' Hai

Gujarati ki wife Gujarati se boli: Aap hazaro me ek hai.

Gujarati ne Ik tappad mara aur bola: Baki 999 kon hain?

sharab 1 bimari he jo samaj ko khatam kar deti he.to aao milkar is bimari ko jaldi khatam karde.1 botol tum katam karo 1 botol ham khatam kare.

MAKKHAN- Tumhari gaadi kaisi condition me hai??
DHAKKAN- Horn k alawa sab cheez aawaz karti hain!! :-|

Girl-HUM Kahan Ja Rahay Hain?
Boy-Long Drive Per.
Girl-Wow.. Pehlay Kyun Nahi Bataya.
Boy-Mujhay Bhi Abhi Pata Chala Hay
Girl:Kaisay BoY:Break Nahi lag rahi

MAKKHAN- Tumhari gaadi kaisi condition me hai??
DHAKKAN- Horn k alawa sab cheez aawaz karti hain!! :-|

Girl-HUM Kahan Ja Rahay Hain?
Boy-Long Drive Per.
Girl-Wow.. Pehlay Kyun Nahi Bataya.
Boy-Mujhay Bhi Abhi Pata Chala Hay
Girl:Kaisay BoY:Break Nahi lag rahi

Baap: beta, paper kaisa huwa?
Beta: bus pehla sawal choot gia!
Baap: acha! aur baqi?
Beta: teesra mujhe aata nhe tha! chotha mai karna bhool gia! paanchwa mujhe nazar nhe aya! chatta paper ki pichle taraf tha, maine dekha he nhe!
Baap ghusy mai bola: aur dosra?
Beta: bus srf wohi galat hua hai. .

DR. k Clinic k age lambi line lagi thi,
1 aadmi bar-bar line me ghusta tha,
log use piche kr dete the,
Aadmi bola- Lage raho salo, mai bhi clinic nahi kholunga.

college ka 1st day...:->
naughty boyzz- what's ur name baby???
Girl- mujhe sab DIDI bulate hain!
Boy- wow!! what a coincident.....mujhe sab JEEJAJI bulate hain..:)

Santa: Bahi Jaldi Jaao tumhare Ghar Mein Barsta ka Pani Ghus Gaya hai,
Banta: Kyun Jhooth Bolte Ho, Gahr Ki Chabbi to mere Pass Hai..?

Bania: Bhagwan, agar tum muje 100 rupe do, to 50 rupe main mandir me dunga.

Thodi dur ja k Bania ko 50 rupye mil gaye.

Funny Bania: Wah Bhagwan, itna bhi bharosa nahi, apne paise pehle hi kat liye..

Boss: Tumhe driver ki job de raha hun. Starting salary Rs.2000/-. Theek hai?

Funny driver: You are great sir! Gaddi START karane ki salary is o.k.......but? ? Gaddi chalane ki salary kitni hai... sir jio?

Kid (mobile cell phone par): Madam, mera beta aaj school nahi aaygea?

Madam: Aap kon bol rahe ho?

Funny Kid: Mere papa bol rahe hain.

.Allaha teri umar lambi karey 2.Allaha tujhy naukri de 3.Allaha tujhy khoush rakhe 4.Allaha tujhy barkat de Yad ho gaya? Aab chal “KATORI” utha aur shuru ho ja.

Bhakt: Bhagwan muje drd de,
Dukh de,
Tension de,
Mujhe barbad kar de,
Mere piche har muskil laga de.

Bhagwan : Abe ek line mein bol na 'GIRLFRIEND' chahiye.

girlfriend tells boyfriend in fanaa style tere paiso ko mere purse mein panaah mil jaaye mere ishq mein teri daulat fanaa ho jaaye subhanallah! !!

Andhe ke hath me “TORCH”,
Bahare ke hath me “RADIO”,
Gunge ke hath me “MIKE”,
AUR AAP KE HATH ME “MOBILE”
WAH WAH Kya Jamana Aaya hai!!!

Newton ne apple niche girte dekha aur GRAVITY discover ki.

Koi us GADHEY se ye puche k ABEY SAALAY!
25 saal se POTTY karta tha to wo kya UPER JATI THI

Bush : Tujhe swimming aati hai.
Lalu : No.
Bush : Tere se kutta acha hai jo swim kar leta hai.
Lalu : Tuje aati hai ?
Bush : Haan
Lalu : Fir tere mai aur kutte mai kya farak hai ?

Akbar: Anarkali tuje kya chahiye?

Taaj ya Takht?

Anarkli:
Jan-e-panah mje na Taaj chahiy aur na hi Takht
bus

kilo chini mil jaye to nwaazish ho ge..

Q-Cyclone kise kahte hai

Santa- CyCle Kharidane k Liye Jo Loan Lete ha
use Cyclone kahte hai

RAAZ public toilet gya to Diwar p likha tha

'Dunya Chand p pohnch gai
or Tm yha bethe ho?

RAAZ niche likh aaya 'Bs Ye kr k Hm b ja rhe he

Mohabbat
ISHQ
Pyar

ye 3 Cheeze Har Tufaan ka Muqabla KR sakti hai
Magar Ek Cheez in Sab Ko Khatam Kar sakti hai
Aur Vo hai
Mummy Ki Chappal.

Teacher Mehnat Karoge
To Kuch Banoge

Sant-Teacher Hamra
Gadha To Itni Mehnat Karta Hai

Magr Wo Ab Tak Kuch Nahi Bana ...;->

FARAZ to RAAZ Ek sawal ka jawab do..

WO KON C UNGLI HAI JIS MAI HADDI NAHI HOTI???

RAAZ-Pata nahi??
FARAZ-DASTANYE KI.

Santa: yaar I m Notice a very Impotant thing
Banta:- Wht is dis?
Santa: Jab railways Fatak Bhand hota hai

Tab

Tab

Tain Jarur aati ha

Budha 1 Ladki Se Tkrya
Budha:-Sorry
Grl:-Stupid
Tabi 1 Ladka us Se Tkrya
Ladka:-Sorry
Grl:-It's Ok
Budha:-Meri Sorry Ki Speling Glat Thi Kya