Jokes for Topic: Male Female

Devdas says to Paro: aik sham mera naam ker do.
Paro : ja ja main kahan or tu kahan.
Devdas:itna garoor tu CHAND ko bhi nahin hai.
Paro:kase hota CHAND per dagh jo hain.
Devdas called his son(CHAND):Tu aaj phir nahi nahea... .

aik adimi ne apni wife ko khat likha'is mahene salary k badley 100 kiss bhej raha hoon.wife ne jawab diya 'app ki salray k badley 100 kiss miley,hisaab bhej rahi hoon.1.doodh wala 2 kiss mea maan giya 2.teacher ko 7 kiss deni pari,3.sabzi wala 7 kiss mea nahi maana isliye 9 deni pari.4makaan malik to rooz 6-7 kiss le jata hay.app fiker nahi kerna,mere pass abhi lag bhag 30,40 kiss or hain.MAHINA ARAM SE KAT JAEY GA

boy- lagta hai hum dono ek sath nhi rah sakte
girl- kya mere papa se mile the
boy- nhi mai tumhari choti bhen se mila tha.

Ek aadmi ki wife ka rang kaala thha, ek din vo peeli saree pehenke apne pathi se puchi, main kaisi lag rahi hoon? hus:Jaise koyla ki factory mein aag lagi ho.

A boy and a girl play ludo. Boy agar 1,2,3,4,5 aya to i will kiss u.
Girl- what? Accha ..Agar 6 aya to.
Boy- Kabhi ludo nahi khela kya, 6 aiya to phir se meri bari....

Santa- Tu office me toh bada sher bana ghumta hai, ghar par kya ho jata hai?
Banta- Hota to sher hi hoon par DURGA sawar ho jaati hai....

'Maathe pe lahu,sir pe ret..Wah!Wah! Jara Gaur karna.Mathe pe lahu,sir pe ret. Kyonki PADOSAN ne phool mara. ''GAMLE SAMET.'

Ravan ko court me le gae bola Gita par hanth rakho RAVEN - Nahi Sita par hanth rakhkar itni musibat aai ab Gita par hant nahi rakhunga.

Salesman tension me tha. DEALER-Kya hua? S.MAN-Mai 6 months tour pe tha, biwi Pregnant ho gai DLR-Ab pata chala bina order k maal aye to kaisa lagta hai..

Aik admi apni biwi ko dafna kay ghar ja raha tha kay achanak bijli chamki, badal garje, jor se baarish shuru hui dukhi aadmi bola: Lagta hai pahunch gai

Ladka: Janeman is dil mein aaja. Ladki: Sandal nikalu kya? Ladka: Pagli mandir thode hi hai, aise hi aaja!!

Luv and Kuch are going to a village & in between comes A well. Luv falls into the well. Why??? Because Luv (love) is blind !!!!! Now , Kuch also jumps inside. Why?? Because Luv ke liye saala kuch bhi karega!!!!

Q: Agar do pipal ke Pedon ko ek rassi se bandh diya jaye to us rassi ko kya kahenge?
A: Us rassi ko bolengey NOKIA - Connecting pipal.

Husband wife ki godh mein leta hua thaa. Wife Kaisa lag raha hai ji. Husband Aise jaise bhagwaan Vishnu Shesh naag ki godh mein lete hai......

Boy chalo!! kisi viran jagah chalte hain..! girl tum aisi vaisi harkat to nahi karoge..?! boy bilkul nahi! girl to fir rehne do....!

Wife:Apko pata hai mr.R apni patni ko kiss karke hi office jate hai,lekin apne kabhi ki. Husband:Chahta to mein bhi hu,lekin mr.R ki biwi nahi manegi.

Santa ka RADIO kharaab ho gaya,
khol k dekha to under CHUHA mara hua tha,
dekh k Santa bola:
AE lo, chalega kaise, SINGER to mar gaya..!

Ek baar priyanka chopra apni scooty pep se jaa rahi thi. Beech rastey mai usse toilet lagi. Voh scooty se utar ke road ke kinarey mein karne lagi.
Ek aadmi ne guzarte hue dekha aur kaha ki aap yaha,aise toilet kyu kar rahi hai....
Priyanka ne kaha 'WHY SHOULD BOYZ HAVE ALL D FUN'

ßeta: Kya is martaba abbu eliction me khare ho rahe hain?
Maa: Wo mere saamne toh khare ho nahi sakte....
Élection me kya khare honge¿?

Poem luvd by girls.
Husband humara aisa ho,wallet me jisk paisa ho.lambi jiski hight ho.Guse ka wo Lite ho.jb sas se meri Fght ho,kahe jaanu Tum hi Ryt Ho..!

Boy: Papa Sach Or Raaz me kia Farq hai?
Papa: Tum mery bety ho Ye Sach hai,Tumhara Dost Arshad B mera hi beta hai Ye 1 Raaz hai

Dost: 'Tumhari toh RAM - SITA ki jodi lagti hai'

Man:'Bilkul Galat hai:

Naa to koi meri biwi ko utha ke le jaata hai, Naa hi ye dharti me samaati hai!

A Couple was sitng in garden,
Sudnly a Dog & Bitch came n kiss each other!

Boy - Janu aagar tum bura na mano to mai bhi.
Grl - Ok pr plz sambhl kar,
Kutiya tumhe kat na le! '

Wife : Ek baat bolu??
Husband : Bolo
Wife : Maaroge to nahi?
Husbund : Nahi to, kya baat hai?
Wife : mai pregnant hun
Husband : Hurray!!! Its gud news, dar kyu rahi thi??
Wife : College ke dino mai papa ko bataya tha to badi maar padi thi.

Girls Collage mai Strike ho gai,Sabhi girls Nare Laga rahi hai,
Girls k satth Boys bhi unka satth de rahe hai,
Girls ne Nare lagate huye 'HAMARI MANGE....,
Piche se Awaz aye,'SINDUR SE BHARO....'.

Girl- Aajtak tune muze kiss nahi kiya, plz karo na.
Santa- No.
Girl- Kyu?
Santa- Bade log kahte he ki aurton ko munh nahi lagate.

Girl: Excuse Me sir, Kya Aap Mere Chehre se 1 chiz hata sakte he?
Man (Khush Hoke): Haan, Zara Boliye To?
Girl: Apni nazar hata lijiye

Girl in a party to a man: Excuse me sir kia aap mere FACE se 1 cheez hata sakte hain?
Man (KHUSH hoe huye): HAAN haan Zaroor bolo kia?
Girl: Manhoos aadmi apni nazrien.

Ek 16 saal ka ladka mar gaya..

Uski maa boli- isne toh abhi duniya bhi nahi dekhi

1 ladki boli- aunty aap chinta nat karo maine dikha di thi

Sante ne Apni Biwi ko Dost k sath ghumte hoye dekh kr Dost ko goli mar di
biwi boli
Apne Gusse pe kabu rakho Varna 1din sare Dosto se Hath
dho bethoge.

Boy- Nice dress!
Girl- Thanx!
Boy- Lipstick bhi acchhi hai..
Girl- Thanx!
Boy- Make up bhi achha hai!
Girl- Thanx bhaiyya!
Boy- Phirbhi sundar nahi lag rahi... ;-)

Mallika Sherawat ne Baba Ramdevji se pucha ke me nahate samay kya lagun ki mera yauvan surakshit rahe ?

Baba ne kaha -
CHITAKANI